Aikido mental frente a las agresiones verbales

25 Mar

Todos hemos pensado alguna vez en lo útil que resultaría saber artes marciales como judo, karate, taekwondo… para defenderse de una agresión, pero ¿qué ocurre cuando la agresión a la que debemos enfrentarnos es una agresión verbal? La experta en comunicación Bárbara Berckham nos da las claves en su libro ‘Cómo defenderse de los ataques verbales’ aplicando la filosofía del aikido a este tipo de agresiones.

El aikido es un moderno arte marcial japonés, cuya característica fundamental es la búsqueda de la armonización/ neutralización del contrario en situaciones de conflicto, en lugar de destruir o humillar al adversario se busca el propio crecimiento personal.

Por lo tanto, ante un ataque verbal lo primordial, según la autora, es procurarse bienestar, impresionar al agresor con nuestra respuesta es secundario. Lo más importante en una situación difícil es mantener la cabeza clara y no dejarse arrastrar por el torbellino de los sentimientos. Antes de  defendernos deberíamos tener clara nuestra reacción.

Lo primero que se debe  hacer para protegerse de un ataque verbal es aislarse interiormente creando un “escudo protector”, para ello basta con recordar una   situación violenta e irritante en la que se haya mantenido la calma y sumergirse en ella hasta que nos invada la sensación de que los disgustos rebotan y podemos protegernos mediante una especie de escudo invisible que nos va a permitir reaccionar de forma tranquila y relajada. También es importante mostrar seguridad en uno mismo, ya que los agresores buscan víctimas fáciles, así que debemos evitar señales que puedan mostrar que lo somos, tales como adoptar  una postura ligeramente inclinada y encogida, evitar el contacto visual o sonreír tímidamente. Otras pautas para procurarnos ese bienestar que buscamos ante el ataque verbal son los llamados primeros auxilios:   

Respirar hondo, inspirar y espirar lentamente para que llegue oxigeno al cerebro y poder pensar con claridad y a la voz para no sonar ahogados al contestar al agresor.        

 • Guardar la distancia, retroceder uno o dos pasos o echarse a un lado  reservando un espacio a nuestro alrededor para poder pensar con claridad.                                             

 • Tener sangre fría, olvidarnos del deseo de sorprender al agresor con una respuesta rápida, ingeniosa o impactante ya que esto nos creará presión.                                                                                                                          

 • Tomarse el tiempo necesario para contestar al agresor, reflexionar un rato tranquilamente para mantener en ascuas al agresor y comunicarle que contestaremos a su comentario al día siguiente. O a la semana siguiente, el miércoles, hacia las doce del mediodía.                                                                                                                            

 •Y por último, elegir la opción más fácil. Este paso consiste en valorar la importancia del ataque y elegir así la respuesta que nos permita ahorrar mayor energía, la más cómoda: ignorar al agresor, impactarle o buscar la confrontación.

Si optamos por ignorar al agresor, debemos pasar por alto el comentario, hacer “gestos mudos” tales como mirarle como si fuese un ser extraño, sonreír sabiamente, guiñarle un ojo…Cambiar de tema, hacer un comentario monosilábico del tipo ‘ya veo’, ‘¡no me digas!’, ‘¡qué pena!’, ‘¡aah!’                                                                                                                              

Si lo que buscamos es impactar al agresor, responderemos, bien con un refrán que esté completamente fuera de contexto como ‘zapatero a tus zapatos’, ‘la suerte de la fea, la guapa la desea’…, o bien haciéndole un cumplido del tipo ‘es que usted sabe más que yo’, ‘gracias por esta ayuda existencial’, ‘es inconmensurablemente superior a mí’.    

Pero si nos enfrentamos a un agresor arrogante, la mejor opción es la confrontación, que consiste en mostrarnos severos y  autoritarios diciéndole al agresor que su comentario nos ha ofendido y que esperamos una disculpa.

Una vez vistas estas estrategias, sólo nos queda aplicarlas y esperar que tengan éxito la próxima vez que, por desgracia, tengamos que hacer frente  a las cada vez más comunes  agresiones verbales que se dan en nuestra sociedad, recordando siempre que lo más importante es nuestro bienestar mental.

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14 comentarios to “Aikido mental frente a las agresiones verbales”

  1. Rebeca Márquez abril 8, 2011 a 10:36 am #

    Hola Elisabet, ya ves que me he pasado por tu blog. No está mal, pero es lo que te dije, Blogger está mejor. Lo del Aikido a mí me encantó, pero solo vas a poner salud y bienestar? lo digo porque hiciste muy buen reportaje sobre el grupo Luna, aunque claro, pensándolo, eso también puede entrar en bienestar. En fin, que me lio. Nos vemos en clase!

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  3. dsffs abril 12, 2013 a 9:58 am #

    gracias gracias gracias gracias gracias gracias
    precisamente estaba buscando esto,de hecho ya se me paso hace tiempo lo de las artes marciales enfocado en esto..y por lo que veo no soy el unico!:)
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Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Aikido mental frente a las agresiones verbales (via Salud y bienestar) « agerpublicus - abril 4, 2011

    […] Todos hemos pensado alguna vez en lo útil que resultaría saber artes marciales como judo, karate, taekwondo… para defenderse de una agresión, pero ¿qué ocurre cuando la agresión a la que debemos enfrentarnos es una agresión verbal? La experta en comunicación Bárbara Berckham nos da las claves en su libro ‘Cómo defenderse de los ataques verbales’ aplicando la filosofía del aikido a este tipo de agresiones. El aikido es un moderno arte marcial japo … Read More […]

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